The two troubles!!

Having two!

No this post is not to judge those who believe in “one and we are done”, I respect their choice. This post is not to tell why “I had second baby”, Coz dude I respect my own decisions first.

This post is specially for those who are in process of attaining motherhood for the second time (physically or mentally). If you are having or want to have second child and are wondering how will you handle the first one or are scared that the first one might get neglected, ignored or side lined or if you are the one who is postponing their decision of having second one because of the elder kid then this post is for you.

Well I always wanted to have two kids and my husband is always happy in whatever I decide. So we thought we are well prepared for the second one, but it was when I actually got pregnant for the second time that we realised what are we up for. Sharing the good news with our daughter wasn’t a problem because she always wanted a sibling. But we were sure she wasn’t ready for what will follow. All through my pregnancy I tried to stay active and be with her but there were things which were not like before and also I knew post delivery a lot of what I have been doing with her won’t be possible for a long time (going out for shopping, park strolls and much more).

So we did a few things which I think helped us and may help you too –

To read the whole post click on

Momspresso

https://www.momspresso.com/parenting/because-at-the-end-it-is-all-worth-it/article/the-two-troubles-6qz9b3j2whr8

Home Breaker – Meghan Markle, Really?

Well when Prince Harry married beautiful, gorgeous and warm Meghan Markle, there were tongues that were wagging. Some thought an American and that too a divorcee doesn’t fit the royal bill, some hated her, some liked her work and thought she isn’t bad, some thought she is a gold digger, some thought its love and it can happen anytime BUT no matter what anyone thought everyone loved how much prince Harry loved her and everyone accepted it as love. And then the royal wedding happened, oh boy what a view it was. Truly a dream come true and then slowly Meghan carved her niche, made her own way with her social work, her pleasant personality, her demeanour and everything else. And then after a couple of months of oh wows rumours again started floating from the paradise.

Meghan was called cold towards the other royals, she was named rude, insensitive and what not and now that she and prince have stepped down from their royal roles to move to Canada and settle in there, she is now being called a home breaker. Home breaker? I mean really?

To read the whole post, please click on the link below

https://www.momspresso.com/parenting/because-at-the-end-it-is-all-worth-it/article/home-breaker-meghan-markle-really

Loving is easy, keeing upto it is not.

Jyoti and Raj were in love with each other even they didn’t know since when. It was during a coaching class that they met each other and fell in love.

After a few months a job in army took Raj to different city and Jyoti joined a job in her city only.


Today Raj was coming back, Jyoti was so happy that finally Raj will speak to his parents and their dreams will come true. In excitement she told her mother about Raj. Her mother told her that she would tell her dad about it and they would meet Raj. Now she was just waiting for the day Raj would come to her house with his parents but she wanted to give Raj his time. She knew he has just come after a year so she was ready to wait patiently.

Days passed by and then weeks, now Jyoti could sense a problem. She realised Raj is not able to gather courage to speak to his parents but she wondered why. Raj told him that his parents have always been obsessed about being Brahmins and Jyoti was a Khatri Punjabi.

Jyoti – “Theek hai Raj mein samajh rahi hun bus mujhe ek date bataa do.”

Raj – “Next week on your birthday I will come to your home with my parents. Ok? Vaise bhi I am taking mummy papa to Rishikesh I will talk to them there only”

Jyoti – “Really, wow!! What a birthday gift it will be for me.”

On her birthday Raj messaged her birthday wishes to which she replied back that she will be waiting for them at dinner. She had asked Raj to come around 7pm. Clock had striked 8 and now she was tensed. Her mother sensed her tension and asked her if she wants to cut the cake, she said “mumma Raj aane wala hoga uske parents ko achba nahin lagega na agar mein cake pehle hee kaat lungi.” Her mother smiled and went back to finish her chores.

It was 9 now and her mother came again came to her and asked if Raj has messaged or called. Her dad could not take it anymore and said “Jyoti beta even now you don’t realise that he won’t come now. If he would have to come he would have by now and if he was stuck somewhere he would have at least called, beta sach ye hai ki vo apne mummy papa se baat nahin kar paya aur mujhe nahin lagta vo kabhi kar payega.”

Jyoti – “But papa he loves….’

Jyoti’s dad – “Beta loving is easy but usko aage le jaana harr ek ke bus ki baat nahin hai. With my experience I can say that vo nahin aayega and honestly beta ab vo aaya bhi toh I don’t think I can trust him enough for my daughter.”

Jyoti – “But papa….”

Her dad said he would have loved to give him another chance but he doesn’t seem worth it. Jyoti kept on calling Raj but no answer he wasnt even replying to her messages. When the clock stuck 12 in the midnight she lost all hopes and was crying inconsolably, to this her parents were furious now. They of course, could not tolerate someone hurting their daughter.

Days passed by Raj didn’t call her and she also had enough of calling Raj, now she wanted to see how much can he do for their relationship. After few days when she came out of her office she saw Raj standing there but today she wasn’t happy. Raj stopped her and said that he knew she is upset and he had hurt her but his parents have not agreed and after listening about his affair his mother is not well also. He pleaded for some more time and told her that he loves her a lot and will soon speak to her parents.

By now Jyoti had realised what her dad said is true and not everyone can stand up to their commitment. She loves Raj and her heart was still with him but in her mind she knew Raj will never be able to speak to her parents and even if he does her parents who are so adamant about castes will never accept her whole heatedly. She remembered what her mother told her on her birthday night that in India its not just two people who marry each other infact it is two families who marry each other.

She stood up and told Raj that now it is too late and like him she also cannot now disappoint her parents again. Raj asked her to trust her that he will soon come to his house. To which Jyoti said “but you are leaving in 5 days for your posting which means once again you will leave with another false promise for me to wait for you. I am sorry Raj you please keep your parents happy and I will make mine proud.”

I am Participating in #ALPxGUN BollyExpress hosted by Alpana and PraGun and sponsored by – UnorthodoxpeepsRangPotliExploreKidsWorldSoulfulFood and, Praggatti Rao

Come ride into 2020 with #BollyExpress

My story is based on the prompt – “Zindagi k safar mein guzar jaate hain jo mukaam.”

A letter to my daughter.

Dear daughter,

No one word can describe what I feel for you. I am writing this letter but I am sure I can still not sum up what all I have in my heart for you. Everyone tells me that you are not as smart as you need to be to face today’s world, people also tell me that I am keeping you shielded from all the bad things that you might have to face in the world.

After growing up you may also feel that my love for you is a bit too much, for that very moment my dear daughter I want to confess today itself. I want to confess that yes I am a bit too much paranoid (I am shaking my head in disbelief but yes this is a fact). I can go mad if I don’t see you (and your brother) for a couple of hours. I am so scared of not being there for you guys at any point of time. I don’t trust anyone else when it comes to my kids (your father is the only exception).

I know I know you might even feel suffocated with all this love but trust me if at all this love is going to do any harm to anyone then it will be me, because all this is stopping me from having a life of my own but you know why I am still doing it happily because dear kid it has been more than 10 years that I am longing for someone to have this kind of love for me.

10 years back when my mom passed away child, I wasn’t even married, was living a happy go lucky life and then the reality struck me and my brother and it did struck hard. We were all by ourselves as our dad chose to fight all his sorrows by being more work alcoholic than he earlier was. I realised how it is to not have someone there for you, I realised how we both had to grow up overnight, suddenly we were not kids for anyone anymore and dear child the fact is no matter what your age you really want to be a kid sometimes. When our dad used to be in a grief of losing his life partner (he would hide it from us because he knew what effect could it have on us), he would straight away head to our grandmother’s room who would cry with him, give his head an oil massage, pat his back, pat his forehead BUT we were expected to be strong.

The whole world as you know perceives me as a strong, mature and independent woman but only I know how does being strong, mature and independent all the time feels, even I want to go weak, act childishly and depend upon to be fed, taken care of and other stuff but I can’t.

THAT my child, THAT has made me the kind of mother I am. I hope you would understand the reason behind my being an almost paranoid mom that I am. I want you both to be my BABIES forever.

Love

Mumma

The Children’s Day blog train is hosted by http://www.prernawahi.com and http://www.vartikasdiary.com

When Chhavi Mittal Hussein’s Trying To Motivate Post Became A Tad Too De-motivating!!

Couple of days back there was a post shared by Chhavi Mittal Hussein on Instagram where she was seemingly trying to motivate everyone to stay fit. Although her motive behind the post may be very noble and clear, her post didn’t go very well with many people, including myself.

For uninitiated Chhavi Mittal Hussein is a hindi film and television actress who is now also seen in web series by SIT (shitty ideas trending), whose she along with her husband is a co-founder. Now in the above mentioned post Chhavi has tried to highlight the importance of staying fit, to which most of us would agree. In fact, I kind of understand the sentiments behind the last line of her post where she tries to troll readers by saying “Now tell me what is your excuse to not work-out, eat junk, and snooze for hours?” But what I don’t understand is that what she means when she says your body shows how hard working you are, it shows how disciplined you are, how much self respect you have, how much passionate you are…… blah blah blah (it doesn’t end here). You can check the screenshot of the same post just here

To read the complete post please click on the link given below

https://www.momspresso.com/parenting/because-at-the-end-it-is-all-worth-it/article/when-chhavi-mittal-hussein-s-trying-to-motivate-post-became-a-tad-too-demotivating

This festive season I counted my blessings twice!!

This time of the year has always been my favourite no points for guessing that it’s festivals that make it so special. As a kid I was always looking forward to what we eat, where we go, who comes to our place and how we celebrate these festivals, I had my perspective to the festivals.

My grandparents on the other hand were always keen about what relatives have given us , what we are going to give them, what is on the menu etc etc. My mom however, I always noticed that wanted everything to be perfect but not for her for us. What we wear, how we look, how much we enjoy, how we celebrate and in doing all this she looked so happy. I used to wonder why.

To read the complete post, click on the link below

https://www.momspresso.com/parenting/because-at-the-end-it-is-all-worth-it/article/this-festive-season-i-am-counting-my-blessings

We the so called real people of the so called fake world!

Few days back there was a picture floating all over social media in which a full apple was depicted from front but shown half eaten in the mirror and the text in the picture said “Life on social media”.

This surprised me to an extent of laughing (mockingly) over the one who made it.Okay, no offence but I don’t buy this new fad of bashing social media and irony is bashing social media on social media. Like seriously? It is like eating the sweet and bashing it too. Well, too much for my understanding.

To read the complete post click on the link below:

https://www.momspresso.com/parenting/because-at-the-end-it-is-all-worth-it/article/we-the-so-called-real-people-of-the-so-called-fake-world

Diaper during daytime: not as frivolous at it seems

As a new mother, we are often told a lot about sleeplessness and fatigue caused because of it when the baby doesn’t sleep through the night. Many of my friends and peers suggested me to keep my baby in diapers during night time so that baby’s sleep isn’t disturbed and thus I am also able to sleep and rest without disturbance. What nobody told me was as much as it is important for a baby to sleep well equally important it is for a baby to have a hassle-free day time to enjoy its play and eating time. I realized that keeping my son diaper-free during daytime resulted in usual mess and disturbance in his activities like massages, playing, crawling, and eating his food. This disturbance was making him less keen on trying to do again (we all know how tough it is to make kids sit at a place and do some task.) In fact, he got discouraged even in trying to crawl or get up because he related all of his activities to his peeing and pooping and I must say not only he but even I was scared of letting him do all the activities because I had a fear of him spoiling stuff.

To read the complete post click on the link below :

https://www.momspresso.com/parenting/because-at-the-end-it-is-all-worth-it/article/diaper-during-daytime-not-as-frivolous-at-it-seems

Because What A Kid Wants – “Tasty”; Because What A Mom Wants – “Healthy”

Making kids eat good food is not easy. Till they don’t grow up to a certain age it is easy to feed them anything you want but as soon as they are big enough to realize their taste buds you can’t feed them just anything. I recently went through the phase where my daughter did not like anything she ate, she wanted every food to be tasty and since we are non-vegetarian parents she is always hooked on to chicken and mutton.

To know what I did and what I fed him read the full post by clicking on the link below :

https://www.momspresso.com/parenting/because-at-the-end-it-is-all-worth-it/article/because-what-a-kid-wants-tasty-because-what-a-mom-wants-healthy

Mom Vs Parent

Most of you by now know that I have a love for writing. So today, when I opened my lifeline, that is my Momspresso app to write something, I was struggling with ideas on what to write. So, I opened the section which gives us prompts for our next post. There I found this topic which caught my eye. ‘What would you like to be a mom Vs a parent.’

To read the whole post click on the link below:
https://www.momspresso.com/parenting/because-at-the-end-it-is-all-worth-it/article/mom-vs-parent

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